THE SECRET TO A GOOD NIGHT'S SLEEP
by Chick Feed
Summary: SPN100 Challenge Word of the Week : Wild - It was warm and snug having her sleeping with her body pressed up against his. But there's something "off" about the woman who's name Dean can't remember. The truth is out there, and it's shocking!


SPN100 Challenge Word of the Week : Wild  
Word count : It just kept on going! You're lucky, I cut over 300 words!  
No Spoilers

Disclaimer : No, I didn't intend for it to go on an' on an' on an' on an'...!

 **THE SECRET TO A GOOD NIGHT'S SLEEP  
** It was warm and snug having her sleeping with her body pressed up against his.  
But there's something "off" about the woman who's name Dean can't remember.  
The truth is out there, and it's shocking!  
-oOo-

The soft sleepy time cloud was being gently ushered away by the warm wakey wakey time breeze. It was a morning for enjoying that slow, relaxed style of waking that included two or three short luxuriant little snoozes en route. Dean lips curled into a comfortable smile and he wriggled backwards, settling tighter into the warm body of... _Julia?_... _Clare?_ Whoever it was that was sleeping spooned against his back, her arm draped over his waist, her hand resting frustratingly close to Little Dean. Feeling content, Dean's brows never-the-less scrunched into a small frown. He usually made a point of remembering the name of the woman he spent the night with... _Monica?...Bethany?_ _Gotta_ _remember before she wakes in case I wanna see her again._ Dean's frown deepened. _Again? Don' remember seein' her a first time; don' even remember goin' out last night._

-o-

Puzzled, Dean gently stroked the woman's arm half a dozen times before it's hirsute condition finally permeated his thoughts, triggering an internal alarm that demanded he instigate emergency procedures.

 _1\. Discount possible false alarm ._

Opening one eye, Dean peeked at the arm.

 _2\. In genuine emergency, GET THE HELL OUT._

Ohhh...It was genuine...That arm wasn't _just_ hairy...It was MAN hairy!

Instantly implementing GET THE HELL OUT, Dean squirmed, shoved and scrabbled, launching _most_ of himself from the bed like a rocket, finding his speedy lift off sabotaged by his own feet becoming firmly entangled in the bedding. From his head to his ankles, Dean gracefully arced through the air, until he was jerked to an abrupt halt by his immobilised feet. Gravity did the rest.

-o-

Lying on his side propped up on one elbow and bare chested, Crowley admired both Dean's impromptu acrobatics and the Hunter's naked torso.

"Darling? I really hope one day you'll learn to stand on your own two feet."

Lying face down on the floor, Dean quickly flipped onto his back, causing both ankles to cross. In a combination of shock and furious outrage he glared up at Crowley.

" ** _What the fu.._**

Crowley tut-tutted the prone Hunter.

 ** _..Udge_** _are you_ _ **doin'**_ _Crowley_ ** _?!_** _Get outta there!..._ _ **No,**_ _wait! Please, tell me_ you're not...? Completely...? _Are_ you...? _ **SAAAAAAAM!"**_

-o-

The two men stared at one another silently, awaiting Sam's arrival. Racing footfalls were heard, Dean's bedroom door banged open, and Sam hit the breaks, his feet coming to a halt outside the room. Grinning, Crowley winked.

"A threesome? What fun!"

Ignoring Crowley, Sam looked to his brother for an explanation.

"Um... _Dean_?"

Cheerfully, Crowley jumped in, answering before Dean could.

" _Well_ , after spending all night making wild passionate lust. My _little_ Squirrel thought you'd like to join us... _Sooo_?"

-o-

Eyes as big as saucers, words completely defying him, Dean spluttered. Sam producing the daemon killing dagger and stalked towards Crowley, who sighed resignedly..

" _Fine_! The truth...I felt lonely. _Alright_? I popped up for a chat...Sad, but you're _still_ the closest I've got to friends... _Happy now_? Sweet lips here was fast asleep and he...looked so _Cute!"_

Dean began make noises like he was going to be physically sick.

"All I did was take the opportunity for a cuddle. Cross-my-heart Dean...Your mano-a-mano virginity is still intact... _Isn't it_?"

Dean froze as Crowley threw back the bed covers, breathing easier when Crowley revealed himself to be wearing silk PJ bottoms. Stretching cat like, Crowley yawned.

"Well, gotta go, busy day and such. I want to thank you though, Dean. Best night's sleep in decades...Is there any chance I could...?"

Dean's voice was a growl.

" _None_!... _Ever_! **_Out_**!"

-o-

Sammy help? My feet...Dunno which is which an' I gotta go!"

Sam untangled his brother's feet for him, then watched while Dean hurried into his en suite. He quickly grabbed four large towels, then stuffed his toiletry bag with extra supplies of everything before marching towards the bedroom door.

"Dean? Where're you goin'?"

Dean paused long enough to glance back over his shoulder.

"The communal shower room, so's I can use them _all_ at once. See you in a couple of hours."

 **END  
** -oOo-  
Chick xxx  
 _Sorry again about the length, I was having fun :)_


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